Out With The Establishment, In With... the... other... Establishment?

My fellow Americans,

It gives me distinct pleasure to announce the impending resignation of my second-vice-arch-nemesis, Harry Reid. No one has done more to hurt the conservative cause than Minority Leader Harry Reid. Not even Jim Inhofe, when he threw a snowball on the Senate Floor.

I wouldn't be so mad, if someone had told me we were allowed to bring props.

It's true, I may have called NASA scientists "flat-earthers" for talking about their observations of climate change, but Harry Reid helped to provide needed medical care to millions of Americans, many of them almost assuredly Democrats.

And that is something up with which we cannot put.

So I call on each and every one of my army of Cruzifers to send a letter to my office supporting an amendment to the ACA so that only Republicans have access to the health insurance exchanges. 

Send your letters to:

Senator Ted CruzWashington, D.C.

Dirksen Senate Office Bldg

Suite 185

Washington, DC 20510

Normally, I'd say repeal it, but I've been shopping on there recently, and the rates are very reasonable.

Keep Cruzin', America.